I've lived in Texas for a whole year! So far I've only...
-dented my car door with the neighbor's truck
-knocked off my front bumper
-been yelled at by one parent
-been hit on by 1 man over the age of 60
-eaten fried pickles and crawfish twice
-recorded one country record
-said "might could" once
-wore an Aggie class ring once
-ridden in the back of a pickup truck once
-danced a wild polka with a 50 year man once
-and bought only one pair of cowboy boots and NO HAT.
For a whole year in Texas, I think that's pretty impressive.
Things I have managed to do:
Learned to salsa dance much better
Become a runner!
survived my first year as a teacher
painted my apartment wall as a chalkboard
Introduced my students to African hip-hop and indie-rock
Learned how to have cute hair in the humidity
got comfortable driving on huge highways
still ride my bike once in a while
fell in love with the cute mexican percussionist at taco milagro
sang karaoke taylor swift to my 5th graders
Taught from atop a desk or sitting on the floor
Cried while reading out loud to my students about the Holocaust
Got kids who have never passed Reading EVER to pass
Got a Texas driver's license
and...made curtains for my apartment.
On the to do list:
-get a tat
-buy a vacuum
-talk to the guy at taco milagro
In all seriousness though, one year in to Texas life I'm content. I have a wonderful support system, I love my job, and I'm learning to know God...know Him, not just know about Him. I'd like a close with a quote that speaks to my heart:
"You may all go to hell, but I will go to Texas"
-Davy Crockett
(Just kidding about the speaking to my heart part)
I really did set out to write a serious post, I guess it's just not in me.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Hopelessness into hope...kinda
A few months ago one of my students just up and moved to Florida to live with his mom. His dad didn't tell us, he just left, we don't know what school he's at or how to contact him or anything. When he moved I was really upset because he was a kid I checked on all the time to make sure he was ok. If he didn't show up to school, we'd call or go to his house. If he didn't eat breakfast, I had food for him. His dad drinks a lot and his two brothers are crazy messed up. Anyway, when he came to school I knew he was at least alive, got two meals a day, and had some clothes to wear. When he moved it brought up this doubt again that God can be trusted with my students. I see so much pain in their lives and wonder often how He can let that happen to them. Without being able to see J every day I lacked trust that God would provide for him and put people who care for him in his life.
Well, this morning my principal came into my room and took me outside in the hallway. She told me that his older brother had been accused of capital murder and was on trial that day. He is 15 years old, and was the person that my student was at home with because his dad was always gone and his other brother was in jail. Apparently this brother killed another teenager and after the kid was dead took the money from his pockets. And it's all on camera so there's no way he will get off. As horrified as I am, at least my little student isn't here to witness all of this. It makes me sick to even think about it--but imagine trying to deal with that if you were an eleven year old and your parents were completely absent from your life and you brother, who you really love in spite of his craziness, killed someone and is being shipped off to prison, probably for life, at 15.
So my little J, wherever you happen to be--I'm glad you're there and not here even though I can't check up on you.
Well, this morning my principal came into my room and took me outside in the hallway. She told me that his older brother had been accused of capital murder and was on trial that day. He is 15 years old, and was the person that my student was at home with because his dad was always gone and his other brother was in jail. Apparently this brother killed another teenager and after the kid was dead took the money from his pockets. And it's all on camera so there's no way he will get off. As horrified as I am, at least my little student isn't here to witness all of this. It makes me sick to even think about it--but imagine trying to deal with that if you were an eleven year old and your parents were completely absent from your life and you brother, who you really love in spite of his craziness, killed someone and is being shipped off to prison, probably for life, at 15.
So my little J, wherever you happen to be--I'm glad you're there and not here even though I can't check up on you.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
It All Depends On How You Look At It
It All Depends on How You Look At It
I.
Terezín is full on beauty.
It's in your eyes now clear
And through the street the tramp
Of many marching feet I hear.
In the ghetto at Terezín,
It looks that way to me,
Is a square kilometer of earth
Cut off from the world that's free.
II.
Death, after all, claims everyone,
You find it everywhere.
It catches up with even those
Who wear their noses in the air.
The whole, wide world is ruled
With a certain justice, so
That helps perhaps to sweet
The poor man's pain and woe.
-Miraslav Kosek, 10
Died, age 12, in a concentration camp.
I.
Terezín is full on beauty.
It's in your eyes now clear
And through the street the tramp
Of many marching feet I hear.
In the ghetto at Terezín,
It looks that way to me,
Is a square kilometer of earth
Cut off from the world that's free.
II.
Death, after all, claims everyone,
You find it everywhere.
It catches up with even those
Who wear their noses in the air.
The whole, wide world is ruled
With a certain justice, so
That helps perhaps to sweet
The poor man's pain and woe.
-Miraslav Kosek, 10
Died, age 12, in a concentration camp.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Reflections on standardized testing and holocaust
This morning I sat down at my desk in my classroom before any kids got there and I looked over at my bulletin board that has a note pinned to it. It says "The way we honor the children of the Holocaust is to not repeat the world that they had." which is a quote from a 5th grader I think I've shared before. Last week I read my students an article about how classrooms are becoming standardized test prep centers and when I finished the article I asked the kids if that was how they felt. All of them immediately answered "yes!"
So today, after reading that note and realizing how my students were feeling, we had a little chat. I asked them how the Holocaust happened, and they talked about how people weren't educated, how they ignorantly followed Hitler because they were in a depression, etc. and so then I asked them how we kept something like that from happening again. Our discussion led to understanding how to decide what is true and what is false by researching it. The beauty of the conversation was that we were able to give a purpose to learning to read and understand what we read that went beyond passing a test at the end of the year.
I hope that someday my students will grow in to people who WANT to learn...I hope.
So today, after reading that note and realizing how my students were feeling, we had a little chat. I asked them how the Holocaust happened, and they talked about how people weren't educated, how they ignorantly followed Hitler because they were in a depression, etc. and so then I asked them how we kept something like that from happening again. Our discussion led to understanding how to decide what is true and what is false by researching it. The beauty of the conversation was that we were able to give a purpose to learning to read and understand what we read that went beyond passing a test at the end of the year.
I hope that someday my students will grow in to people who WANT to learn...I hope.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Time for a lighter post.
Yesterday I pulled a piece of paper off of my overhead cart and all my papers came cascading down. One of my students goes "See Ms. Maxwell! That's why you gotta CLEAN" Then she stayed after school with me and helped me clean up the room.
Last night my roommate and I and our friend watched Muppets in Space, which if you haven't seen it, is absolutely hilarious. Anyway, the little Prawn Pepe made me laugh so hard that today in 3rd period reading class I did his voice...for most of the time. We were laughing so hard, I loved it.
I read a story out loud to my class about this guy that worked at the zoo and there was a funny trick ending. It was really funny to see the reactions of the different classes because my first perioed class has 3 gifted students in it who got the joke right away and were laughing like crazy. However, my next period is my ESL class and no one really got it at all. Finally in third period, there were about 2 seconds of silence after I finished reading and then they all started laughing really loudly. Today was one of those days when no matter how many kids get in trouble or don't bring their homework or how inadequate I feel as a teacher, I love it.
Yesterday I pulled a piece of paper off of my overhead cart and all my papers came cascading down. One of my students goes "See Ms. Maxwell! That's why you gotta CLEAN" Then she stayed after school with me and helped me clean up the room.
Last night my roommate and I and our friend watched Muppets in Space, which if you haven't seen it, is absolutely hilarious. Anyway, the little Prawn Pepe made me laugh so hard that today in 3rd period reading class I did his voice...for most of the time. We were laughing so hard, I loved it.
I read a story out loud to my class about this guy that worked at the zoo and there was a funny trick ending. It was really funny to see the reactions of the different classes because my first perioed class has 3 gifted students in it who got the joke right away and were laughing like crazy. However, my next period is my ESL class and no one really got it at all. Finally in third period, there were about 2 seconds of silence after I finished reading and then they all started laughing really loudly. Today was one of those days when no matter how many kids get in trouble or don't bring their homework or how inadequate I feel as a teacher, I love it.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
On sadness, hopelessness, and how useful those are.
this week one of my student's fathers (who just got out of jail) stole his mom's truck.
last week one of my students whose father is an alcoholic and whose two older brothers are both in juvey and only owns his uniform clothes moved off to FL where I hope to God someone will take care of him better than here.
two weeks ago one of my students was crying every 5 minutes in class because she was worried that her family wouldn't be able to pay their mortgage. When I was a kid, I didn't even realize my parents HAD a mortgage.
This job of teaching inner city kids is emotionally draining, at times feels completely pointless, and makes me, more than anything else, doubt that God really loves these kids. However, here is a quote from Brennan Manning that is slowly sinking into my distrusting heart:
"The basic premise of biblical trust is the conviction that God wants us to grow, to unfold, and to experience fullness of life. However, this kind of trust is acquired only gradually and most often through a series of crises and trials...David, the most beloved figure of Jewish history, was no stranger to terror, loneliness, failure, and even sinister plots to destroy him; yet he ravished the heart of God with his unwavering trust."
It seems then that trust that God is good comes through situations where it really looks like God is actually not good at all.
last week one of my students whose father is an alcoholic and whose two older brothers are both in juvey and only owns his uniform clothes moved off to FL where I hope to God someone will take care of him better than here.
two weeks ago one of my students was crying every 5 minutes in class because she was worried that her family wouldn't be able to pay their mortgage. When I was a kid, I didn't even realize my parents HAD a mortgage.
This job of teaching inner city kids is emotionally draining, at times feels completely pointless, and makes me, more than anything else, doubt that God really loves these kids. However, here is a quote from Brennan Manning that is slowly sinking into my distrusting heart:
"The basic premise of biblical trust is the conviction that God wants us to grow, to unfold, and to experience fullness of life. However, this kind of trust is acquired only gradually and most often through a series of crises and trials...David, the most beloved figure of Jewish history, was no stranger to terror, loneliness, failure, and even sinister plots to destroy him; yet he ravished the heart of God with his unwavering trust."
It seems then that trust that God is good comes through situations where it really looks like God is actually not good at all.
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Some more Texas
It's been a while, I've seen a lot more of Texas life, and enjoyed most of it immensely. Here are a few Texas tidbits for my anxious readers.
I was an Aggie for Halloween. If you don't know what that is, it's a person who went to Texas A&M University. So I wore a class ring and cowboy boots and a jean skirt and a shirt that said "You may all go to hell, but I will go to Texas" and I had big hair. I may have offended some people since most people I know went to aTm.
The past week we have been studying the Holocaust in my 5th grade class. You know, when you need to teach your class how to spell a word and write it on the board lots of times, you learn how to spell it. Holocaust and Renaissance, two words I finally know how to spell. Anyway, we are reading Number the Stars, which is a wonderful book, and we were talking about how Denmark didn't fight back against the Nazis but allowed them to take over in return for political independence. One student raised his hand and said, "But didn't they have an army?" and I said, "Yes, but a small one, not big enough to win against the Nazis." And then one kid randomly calls out, "Yeah, but they couldn't beat TEXAS."
Teaching about the Holocaust has given me a really big sadness and horror about the state of the world, but at the same time, teaching Number the Stars has been wonderful. It's estimated that there were 7,300 Jews living in Denmark at the beginning of WWII. All but 300 of them were able to escape through fishing boats to Sweden and it's estimated only 50 Danish Jews died in the Holocaust. It's such a beautiful story of courage and what people can do, but it makes me really sad to think of what we didn't do at the same time. Hand in hand with teaching the Holocaust I'm teaching about Japanese Interment camps in the U.S. and in Social Studies the kids are studying colonists and Native Americans. Poor kids--that's a lot to take all at once. To go along with teaching the Holocaust, we read the allegory Terrible Things by Eve Bunting. I'd highly recommend it if you are ever trying to get a child to understand what can happen if we don't stick up for what's right.
On a lighter note, I like Lonestar beer now. Who would have guessed.
I'm enjoying 70 degree sunny weather every day in November, new girl friends, biking around the city to church and along the Bayou, having beautiful symphony music at my fingertips, and finding new places to dance and speak Spanish. Life is normalizing a little more, but I'm still missing Chicago and Maryland. Why is it that life ends up so spread out?
I was an Aggie for Halloween. If you don't know what that is, it's a person who went to Texas A&M University. So I wore a class ring and cowboy boots and a jean skirt and a shirt that said "You may all go to hell, but I will go to Texas" and I had big hair. I may have offended some people since most people I know went to aTm.
The past week we have been studying the Holocaust in my 5th grade class. You know, when you need to teach your class how to spell a word and write it on the board lots of times, you learn how to spell it. Holocaust and Renaissance, two words I finally know how to spell. Anyway, we are reading Number the Stars, which is a wonderful book, and we were talking about how Denmark didn't fight back against the Nazis but allowed them to take over in return for political independence. One student raised his hand and said, "But didn't they have an army?" and I said, "Yes, but a small one, not big enough to win against the Nazis." And then one kid randomly calls out, "Yeah, but they couldn't beat TEXAS."
Teaching about the Holocaust has given me a really big sadness and horror about the state of the world, but at the same time, teaching Number the Stars has been wonderful. It's estimated that there were 7,300 Jews living in Denmark at the beginning of WWII. All but 300 of them were able to escape through fishing boats to Sweden and it's estimated only 50 Danish Jews died in the Holocaust. It's such a beautiful story of courage and what people can do, but it makes me really sad to think of what we didn't do at the same time. Hand in hand with teaching the Holocaust I'm teaching about Japanese Interment camps in the U.S. and in Social Studies the kids are studying colonists and Native Americans. Poor kids--that's a lot to take all at once. To go along with teaching the Holocaust, we read the allegory Terrible Things by Eve Bunting. I'd highly recommend it if you are ever trying to get a child to understand what can happen if we don't stick up for what's right.
On a lighter note, I like Lonestar beer now. Who would have guessed.
I'm enjoying 70 degree sunny weather every day in November, new girl friends, biking around the city to church and along the Bayou, having beautiful symphony music at my fingertips, and finding new places to dance and speak Spanish. Life is normalizing a little more, but I'm still missing Chicago and Maryland. Why is it that life ends up so spread out?
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